Feeling a bit weary
this week. February is my toughest month in MN. At this point, I am over the
cold, snow, and freezing rain. This time of year everyone is posting or talking
about their tropical vacations and yes I am green with envy. DUH.
The high today was 10
degrees..the high. I will
try to not hate you if your weather is nice. This year, my parents
are residing in Florida for a few months, and when I get a text like “oh it so
cold here today only in the 50s” I can not help but roll my eyes, it makes me want to scream or cry and
sometimes maybe both. I sometimes can't respond to these messages.
The kids seem to be picking up
every virus around town, and I have lost track of how many sick days there
have been. I am so OVER sickness. I am over Pedialite in my
fridge and Tylenol in my cupboards and essential oils in my
humidifier just in case that works too. Don’t get me wrong, I'm thankful
I have these items. I'm just over it.
This time of year is just
tough in MN. Though daylight is short the days seem long and I
just dream of spring. I need blues skies, green grass and warmth, like an
addict needs its drugs.
I’m over having to dress 4 kids
from head to toe with coats, hats, gloves, and socks! This alone takes serious
time. And by the time we load up the car, I’m exhausted! Most of the time spent
prepping them for the single-digit-temperatures is wasted. The babies despise
their gloves. They tear them off and toss them with disregard. I refuse to buy
more mittens this year and in desperate moments, I’ve found that socks work
just as well. We’re classy like that.
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| Socks on our hands, were nothing but classy! |
Speaking of socks – I’m over
those too! I’ve given up trying to find matching ones for the kids. There is a
sock monster in our house named Phoebe the Dog! So to say the least, I’m ready
for “put on your sandals and we’re ready to go” weather!!
This last week has been crazy,
we have had 4 sick kids. This bug is from the devil himself and I have never
seen my kids throw up like this. The one amazing thing is that Zak and I
have somehow not gotten sick and for this we sing praise to Jesus forever and
ever. HE IS GOOD!
The kids, on the other hand,
have been sick for over a week. We have “puke buckets” in every room
just in case you can't make it to the toilet. Towels laid around
you just in case they miss. The 15 month old twins are
the hardest to contain, as you can imagine. They seem fine one minute
so you drop your guard, refill your coffee and the
next moment, it's everywhere.
I have an oppressive mountain of
laundry, so much so that I am not even sure you can see the washer and dryer
from the door. When my kids are sick their personalities go from one
extreme to the other. One moment they are cuddling and telling you how much
they love you and the next they are screaming on the floor because you bought
bubble gum flavored Tylenol instead of grape and now you are dead to
them.
In the midst of this oh so
lovely week, when I thought things couldn’t get worse - the day
after I had brought Liam to the doctor because he could not stop
vomiting, I had to call my husband a second time to come home because
this time one of the twins, Lucy, fell off the kitchen chair, and
when I picked her up I discovered she was bleeding quite a bit.
These two babies have made it
their mission in life to climb everything. I finally put a huge gate
to barricade them outside of the kitchen and they
still manage to sneak in.
I frantically called
people nearby and could not get a hold of anyone. What are you
supposed to do with 4 small kids, 2 of them so sick. I called an ambulance,
yup again, this is my 4th ambulance phone call in 3
years. Insert eye roll. I have become that crazy neighbor lady, I am
sure of it. Soon, I am going to be on a first name basis with the
rescue crew here. The first time was when Zak was having chest pains and
was having trouble breathing. The 2nd time was for
Lucy a few weeks after she was first born and we think she aspirated
a little and was breathing funny. Lucy came home from the hospital only
weighing a little over 4 pounds and we didn’t want to take any
chances. The third was for Lucy when she had RSV and she was
struggling to breath and turned blue around her mouth, she needed a little
oxygen and was admitted at Childrens.
4th time? What
do you know - Lucy again with her bleeding head. See a pattern
here? This girl is already turning my gray hair.
Luckily she is the cutest,
spunkiest thing in the whole world. The bleeding stopped and they checked
her out, she had the largest egg on the back of her head that I have ever
seen. They advised me to bring her to the ER just to get her checked out and
sure enough little Lucy needed stitches. I have 3 crazy boys, but leave it to
Lucy to get stitches first.
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| Here is little Lucy Rambo-lita waiting to be stitched up |
I’m now entering week 2 of
the sickies, and my husband is now out of town. I write this not to complain.
Although it feels good to vent a little (and please know it’s all
done with a comical tone). Sarcasm is how I survive, it’s in my blood. I
come from a long line of quick-witted, sarcastic women. We think we’re funny
and that’s all that matters.
I know many others are
going through so much worse, but I write this because I know I’m not
alone here. I have talked to so many other mamas who are weary at the moment.
Because they are over the throw up and the laundry and they just can’t seem
to catch a break. I write because if I don’t laugh at all of this, I
will cry. In tired moments, everything seems worse. In tired moments, we hate
our spouses for silly things like having a full-time job. Rationality
is not really available when you’re sleep deprived. I write this to encourage
you and to encourage me - to remind us that this is just a season we
are in.
Mamas of littles, hang
in there!! Soon they won’t need us to wipe their behinds and let’s hope
they will make it to the toilet when they are sick. I write this to
commend you. I know that behind closed doors, you’re
cleaning messes you never imagined. You’re tackling the never ending laundry,
paying bills, trying to work, running kids to and fro. You may feel
like no one notices and no one sees you. I see you and I know you’re
awesome.
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| I saw this posted of face book the other day. I NEED this mug. |
I am not going to let this
stomach virus or February in MN steal my joy, lose my drive and bring me down.
My mom always says that being a mother is the best training for any job in
the world. She now works at Microsoft and I couldn’t be prouder of
her. I can’t help but think she’s right (she would say she is
always right). Being a mother is the best, but hardest job in the
world. Now that I have my own family, I truly get it. If we can
do this, and we can and are, then we can do anything. The
possibilities are endless.
To combat my
weariness and to fight the good fight against negativity, we’re
having dance parties at least twice a day. We are “shaking it off’ as Taylor
Swift puts it. We are finger painting and putting fake tattoos on. Today,
I’m rocking a Spider-man tattoo, be jealous. I’m planning fun things
with friends in the weeks to come - putting some bright things to look forward
to in my calendar. I may even treat myself to a manicure next week, I’m crazy
like that! Put on lipstick. Doing my devotions, relying on
his strength. I can’t do it all, or worry about it all. I know
the struggle is real, but I know we aren’t alone. Let’s keep
moving forward. Soon it will be warm. It will be Spring - time for sandals,
sunglasses, and skirts (and maybe some sangria). It will be time to be outside
again, time to let the kids play and explore and burn off their never-ending
energy. Soon.
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| I have given up keeping books on the shelf. Plus it kept them occupied for a while. |
For now, when we’re stuck inside,
let’s still try and find joy each day with our littles. Let’s
plan some things that recharge us. Let’s pray for children
sleeping through the night…can I get an Amen?! Let’s be OVER
worrying about we can’t control. Let’s be OVER
circumstances stealing our joy. I don’t know about you, but I am over it.
