Fearless 2017

A New Year is upon us....

In reflection, this last year was pretty good to me. It was a year of intentionality for me. That was my word for last year; its theme, if you will. I had seen others do this, where instead of just New Year’s resolutions, you pray and think about a word you want to focus on for the year. Mine was intentional. Every area in my life needed me to be more intentional - my relationships, my marriage, my health, my attitude. 

I feel I achieved it in many ways. I was able to reconnect with friends this last year and spend time with new ones. I got to travel to some amazing places. Zak and I have been more intentional in our time together, devotions, and growing our relationship. Within our own four walls, we have been intentional with family time, and connecting each night with the kids. We aren’t perfect, but we’ve taken steps in the right direction. I was also intentional in my health and exercise. This was a big one for me this year, but it really has become part of my lifestyle dare for the first time. 

The last few weeks, I have been thinking about what my word is for 2017. Through prayer, thought, and conversation, I think my word is FEARLESS. 

If I can be totally transparent for a moment, the word itself gets me worried. Why this word? What will I have to be fearless against? ...and the thoughts keep going. 

Hence why it needs to be my word. 

I have taken some steps in bravery over the last few years in saying “yes” to things I would have once avoided. But I have still tiptoed around doing fearlessness fully. I still worry too much about what others think. I still worry too much, period. 

So this year I want to be fearless - in who I am and in who God created me to be. 

I have always felt out of place, like a misfit my entire life. The harder I ever tried to fit in, the more awkward I would become. I have always been a little on the quirky side, and I have never identified with the so called “cool kids.” I was 6ft tall in 6th grade and wasn’t into sports at the time. In fact, when people commented on my height and asked me what sports I played, I would push up my pink glasses, toss back my freshly permed hair and respond with “I like to read books, I don’t play sports.” They usually stopped talking with me at that point. 

The point of my rambling is this, I want to be fearless in the things God has put in my heart and all the ingredients that make up me. I want to walk in that boldly and unapologetically. I want to be okay with not being everyone’s cup of tea. Because frankly, you are probably not mine either. And that’s okay - not everyone is “our people.” 

I am a 6ft tall girl with a Minnesotan accent despite moving and trying hard not to say "you guys." 

I am a bit nerdy, I think a good time is me with a great book.  I love makeup, a great pair of shoes and big hair. I love to read and write and I still mess up on my grammar...all the time. Math is a foreign language to me. I love old movie, movies with heart and soul and all the Lethal Weapons. Don't judge me. I have no rhythm. As much as I want to be good at Zumba, this may never be a reality for me. But I still may go and shake it any ways. I am deeply sensitive, a “feeler” if you will, I feel your pain. My heart breaks every day for the things that others go through and endure. I am social, yet an introvert. My emotions get the best of me most days. I have always talked too much and sometimes say the wrong thing. I have lost count of how many times I have had to insert my big foot (no really size 11) in my dumb sarcastic mouth. Small talk is not my forte, awkward is. I believe I am funny and my people think I am too.  I am done apologizing for being a mess, for taking up too much space in this world, and for not being perfect. I am just going to be who God made me to be. I am the tall, nerdy, awkward girl that likes to wear big hats. Yes. More hats will be worn this year. Amen. 

I want to be fearless in my new position with IJM. It’s a volunteer position but I had to interview for it. It had been ten years since I have interviewed for anything so that alone took me some courage. I want to be fearless in being a voice for those who do not. I want to help raise up more awareness here in Minnesota and grow more and more freedom-fighting partners. I want to be fearless in standing with the 27 million people in slavery today. I want to be fearless for those children being abused, for the young women who are trafficked and tortured, and to fearlessly to be a voice for those who may never have one. 

I want to be fearless in my walk with Jesus - to let him continue to direct my steps and to live “palms up” as Bob Goff says. I want to surrender fearlessly to his will and to trust without always knowing all the details.  I want to be the kind of women that “laughs at the days ahead” and that doesn’t worry about tomorrow. 

I want to be fearless in my faith - the “I hit my knees before I freak out” kind of faith. Faith, I believe is something we learn, something we practice. It’s like confidence or fearlessness - we may not always “feel it.” But when practice it, live it, and walk it out..it follows and grows. When I am not feeling it, I will play this song on repeat. 

This is one of my verses for the year. 

Also this  --  Psalms 91:12 This I declare about the Lord, he alone is my refuge, my place of safety, he is my and I trust him. I want to have faith over fear in my daily life. (Yes, I went a little quote-happy this blog, but there are so many good ones I had to share." 

So as we embark on a new year filled with new memories, adventures - some good and some maybe harder than others - let’s remember what Psalms 9:10 says “those who know your name will put their trust in you, for you Lord, have not forsaken those who trust you and seek you.”

I’m ready. Happy New Year, friends - What's your word for 2017?

Perhaps Christmas means a little bit more....

I wanted to write this weeks ago before we headed into the Christmas season to give some ideas on how we are trying to do Christmas differently in our house. But as usual, the weeks flew by and here we are December 4th and in full-on Christmas mode.

So just a quick note on how we do Christmas. It’s not set in stone. It may work some years and not others. I may find new things to throw in there. I’m crazy like that!

It began a few years back when we had Liam and Kellan. Christmas started to feel a little empty for us. We struggled financially and worried our Christmas's mornings would not compare. In that insecurity we would over leverage ourselves and spend more then we should. On top of that I think our parents may have over compensated for us these years as well, or maybe just excited over grand babies. Either way the boys still ended up with so much stuff.  

We started to see little entitled attitudes beginning to emerge from the boys. They were never really thankful for all they had under the tree. We realized our perspective had been off. Inspired by other bloggers trying to live differently in a world that is already too self-focused, we decided to change things up. See previous blog. 

Ever since Elf on the Shelf debuted, my 8-year old son has begged us to get one. You see, “all” his friends have one and he is convinced we’re the only people on the planet not doing it. I’ve always given a firm NO backed with my reasoning. I get that it can be fun. But I just didn’t want the pressure of one more thing to do each night for the month of December and more focus on “what am I going to get?” It just seemed like too much. 

After much back and forth over the years with my oldest (who I’m pretty sure could be destined for a career as a lawyer), I pitched him the idea of “Kindness Elves.” My friend had told me about the idea last year. I loved it, but just wasn’t up for it that year. And I may have been secretly hoping that they’d forget about Elf of the Shelf. However, firstborns don’t forget. Thankfully, Liam loved the idea of the Kindness Elves and so began the dawn of a new era in the Kane household. At least for this year. Meet Kandy and Kane...clever, I know. wink-wink.

I will keep you posted on some of our random acts of kindness. The first two days went really well! The kids were so excited and giggling, they swear they saw foot prints in the freshly fallen snow that morning. They went to making cards for the mail carrier straight away and we had a lovely morning. So maybe there will be something to these elves after all. 

I have found it true in life that when I’m going through something, sometimes the best way to move forward is to help someone else. There’s a kind of healing that happens. It lifts our spirits just as much, perhaps even more. The times we’ve served as a family are some of my all-time favorite memories. We laugh, meet new friends, and focus on that moment.

The best thing is that it brings us all together as a family, too. We’re on mission together. We’ve seen our kids hearts change. They bring new ideas to the table throughout the year. We have seen a shift in our house and hearts and we like it. The holidays seem a little richer, a little more meaningful. I’m excited for the adventure and new memories that the kindness challenges will bring this season. 

Another thing we have added is the book by Ann Voskamp, "Unwrapping the Greatest gift: A family Celebration of Christmas." Each night, I read a day. I try to make it fun - sitting around having hot cocoa or under the Christmas tree. But there are nights we miss, or times we read it over breakfast. Remember, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. Do what you can, keep it simple, and just enjoy it. You can order it here. 

This is our third year where for Christmas gifts for the kids we are doing “something you want, something you need, something you wear, somethings you read.” I think we are lifers on this one. It makes shopping easier for me and less stressful, the kids seem even more content with what they get that morning. It has shifted attitudes and hearts all around. 

Another thing that helps me enjoy this season more is saying “no.” It’s ok if you can’t go to every holiday party that is happening. It’s okay if you can’t face one more day shopping amongst the masses – BLESS YOU AMAZON. It’s okay to know when you need to stay home with your family and unplug.

I think serving and kindness to others are what we’re called to do all year round - to stay alert and do what we can for those in our zone of life. To say thank you more, to remember how hard the postal carrier works, to think of the people in the most thankless jobs.  I like to focus even more so this time of year when we’re spending all this money, trying to find the perfect gifts. It gives us perspective and helps us keep our focus on what truly matters each day.   

It’s important to remember that for so many, this is a difficult time of year. Those who are living paycheck to paycheck are wondering what they are going to do come Christmas. I have been that person and the stress of Christmas was too much some years. It’s important to remember to show our kids that so much of the world doesn’t live this way. But being together and the memories we make are the sweetest gifts of all. So this year (and every year) - “Maybe Christmas doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more!”

Thankful. 

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. I love that it’s a season of dwelling on the good things in our lives and less on the stuff we want. I love hearing my children talking more about what they are thankful for, instead of their ever growing list of wants. Anytime I was going through a hard time in my life as a kid, my mom would tell me to go and “count my blessings.” She meant business, too. She would actually get me pen and paper and have me write them out. Even if I had started out annoyed at her simple solution, I did always start to feel better by the end of my list. It’s one of the reasons I love the worship part of church as well. When we start to lift our hands to heaven and praise the King of the world, we remember how big He is and somehow our problems seem smaller. 

As I reflect on not just this year but the many before it, I am in awe of how God has been so good to me. Even seasons that felt like hell, he used the flames to refine me, to give me a deeper appreciation for all I have, and to realize that each day is a gift and each good thing comes from above. He used every moment and season for his glory, for something greater. There were moments he pruned away my selfishness and insecurities (these two may be need ongoing maintenance), anger, and unforgiveness.

What I am most in awe of looking back is that he heard each prayer or cry that I had sent up. Each cry that was in desperation or frustration, he did hear. He may not have always answered in the way I wanted or in the timeframe I would have preferred, but my prayers were heard and answered better his way than my own.

I have been reading the book “Play with Fire” by Bianca Olthoff. It’s fantastic and you should buy it immediately. I have most the book underlined with notes written in the margins. The husband keeps asking when he can start reading it and I may have suggested he order his own copy.

What I am loving about it is that even though her story is different in circumstances and events than mine, her story is my story. It’s your story. It’s the Israelites’ story. It’s about our fight for his plans versus our plans. It’s about walking through the storms of our lives and crying out to him, surrender that we find when we have no more fight. Bianca says that “What looks like impending death or utter despair signifies the beginning of a rescue, a demonstration of resurrection or the impetus for revival.” 

I remember as a teenager being afraid to tell God to have his way in my life. I was scared he would stick me in the middle of Africa with no running water or electricity. I forget which missionary book we read in high school, but I remember a part where the missionary had a gigantic tapeworm that came up his throat looking for food.

A tapeworm. Up his throat. Nope. Not me. Please send someone else.

I was scared that what he had for me, and I would hate. I wanted to try to do life my way. Even though I still went to church and read my bible, I wasn’t fully surrendered to his plan for my life.

I was always envious of those who knew from a young age what they wanted to do or be when they grew up.

I had no clue.

I knew what I didn’t want to do. I had given my list to God many times. All I did know was that I wanted to travel and be a mom. I knew I wanted to make a difference in this world and somehow make it better. 

I remember crying out when Liam and Kellan were small and money was so tight I wasn’t sure how we were even going to be able to buy food the following week. I remember during this same season, where loneliness was my companion, as I was still adjusting to this stay-at-home mom gig. This time in my life was so overwhelming I could barely eat. If you know me, this is never a problem for me. I began praying for new friends, old friends, people to do life with. 

I look back at these seasons and I see that God never left me. He used each season for his good. He is God and he can take the worst things in our life and still find some way to redeem them if we let him.

But all of these answered prayers took steps of faith as well.

He put people or events in my path that led me to where he wanted me to be. Yes, sometimes it was all him, when he sent money out of the blue or a local pastor pulled up with a trunk full of groceries when he didn’t even know how much we needed them. But sometimes it took me stepping out of my comfort zone. For example - my very first night at Moms’ Group at church, I was terrified.

But the very first person who came up to me, not only eased my fear and made me feel welcomed, but turned out to become one of my closest friends.  

Pregnant with twins, Noonday’s vision was on my heart and I said yes to becoming an ambassador even though it didn’t make sense to start something with two impending babies. But I couldn’t shake it. Not only did it bring amazing friends into my life, it broadened my mind. I found women whose hearts were also breaking for what broke God’s and were wanting to live differently. Noonday then led me to work with IJM, and my eyes were opened even more to what was going on in the world. 

I find it ironic that after having my twins, I have traveled more than ever before. First with IJM to Washington DC to lobby. Something that, again, I was terrified to do! God has used even more trips since then to stretch me, strip down insecurities, and know that I am rooted in him. I’ve gone to Austin TX, with Noonday, Paris & Costa Rica with husband, Miami with friends, and Greece & Cyprus with church. 

If you would have told me years ago, that I would go to these places after my twins, I would have never believed you!

We serve a good God. It’s taken me years to accept and understand the depths of God’s love for us, for me. I still struggle at times with comprehending the how and why. But as a mother, I know the love I feel for my children. He loves us even more than that.

Mind blown right?

But when we start believing that, we live differently. We see everything differently. Fear and doubt may still come in, but we remember whose child we are. I stopped caring what others think of me and cared only what he thought of me. It’s freeing!

God never had to prove his love for me, but all through my life he keeps on showing me. He keeps on pursuing me. He is the only one that will work the broken things in life for good. He is the only one that will never leave us or forsake us. He will never reject me no matter what I have done. We may go through hard times but he will never leave me, and for that I am eternally thankful.

I think God wants us to cry out to him more. He already knows what you’re thinking and feeling. I still struggle and have desert seasons. I still wrestle with feelings and emotions I don’t know what to do with.

He knows you’re angry or hurt, and have so many questions...wait that might be just me.

I have so many questions, thoughts and feelings - bless it. 

He can handle it. Bring it to him. Lay it all out there. Be authentic with the one who created you. One thing Bianca says in her book that I love and triple-underlined is this:

“If God knows all - including my heart and mind - why do I have to express myself aloud to Him? Why do I have to pray? And here’s what I found. Yes, God knows our hearts and hears the faintest whispers for help rising from the deepest places in our spirits. But when we’re desperate enough to cry out, we are humbled. And when we’re humbled enough, something happens - God responds with saving power.”

So this Thanksgiving, if you find yourself in a desert in your life, I pray you seek God and cry out to him. Seek life-giving friends and a life-giving church. Say “YES” to what he puts in front of you. Take it moment by moment. I’m a believer that we were made for community and to do life together. It’s not going to be perfect. It’s going to be messy and beautiful all together. You can’t have the good without the bad...don’t make me start singing the theme song to “Facts of Life.” You get the point. The amazing thing is a lot of the time the answer is each other, were meant to do this “bruitiful” life together (thank you Momastery).

I’m so thankful that God answered my prayers and has sent me amazing group of women who make me better and friends from my past who are my soul sisters. I know that during my trials it was the “your pain is now my pain and we’re in this together” kind of friendship that kept me going. Im so thankful to my family, to my Moms and Aunts who prayed and helped whenever they could. I would not be here with out them. 

God gives us each other.

So this Thanksgiving, that verse in the bible that use to always slightly annoy me saying “rejoice during trials” is actually true. I like the message version "Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try and get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you will become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way" (James 1:2-4). I am thankful for the flames that surrounded me and that keep on refining me. I am thankful for the moments I got to feel His peace and know He was there. I am thankful for the people who were Jesus to me. I am thankful that God hears my cries and loves me despite of my shortcomings. I am thankful for all he has given me, for my beautiful children and all he has restored. I am thankful he loves me, all of me.

I am thankful. 

Change your place, Change your pace, Change your perspective.

Greece. Change your place, change your pace, change your perspective. 

Fresh off the plane from a 10-day trip to Thessaloniki, Greece and Cyprus. The jetlag is kicking in and I have been awake since 3;30am am. I decided to stop fighting it and get up and make good use of my time. I will be drinking ALL the coffee today. There are so many things I want to share with you from this trip…so many stories. My prayer is always God uses my blog for his glory, and I pray it stirs something in my readers. 

“Change your place, change your pace, change your perspective” was heard many times from our missionary leader in Greece. It was one of the first things he spoke to us and as the days went on, the truth of those words rang in my ears. 

We began in Thessaloniki with the “Walk for Freedom” with the A21 Campaign. A21 fights human trafficking. This was one of the reason this trip tugged at my heart. I will never forget the day 9 years ago when I first learned about human trafficking, I will never forget that there are more in slavery today than ever before. That there are over 27 million in slavery and 2 million of those are children. The average victim is 12 years old. Of those numbers, only 1-2% are ever rescued. 

These statistics are not ok. They break my heart. But as Christine Caine has said, compassion is action. I can’t just feel bad about it and do nothing. I support groups like A21 and IJM, using my time, talent, and money as I am able. I have gone to Washington DC to lobby for change. It’s easy to think that this is some other country’s problem. But it’s happening in your own backyard, in your city.  

As we walked the streets to bring awareness to human trafficking, I prayed for Thessaloniki; that more are found, more are rescued, and more operations are shut down. After the walk was over, we were approached by a small girl, maybe 6 or 7, asking for money. She had a big scar on her face that almost looked like it was from a burn. There was something in her eyes that seemed so far off to me, almost dead…like she wasn’t there. We were informed that there are many children there that they are basically trafficked to beg for money. They injure or hurt them to gain more sympathy. Even though I know these things occur, seeing it, seeing her, broke me. The enemy is so pathetic that he goes after the innocent and the vulnerable. 

We spent one day in Greece, then headed to Cyprus. If you’re like me, you don’t really know anything about Cyprus. I assumed it was part of Greece. But I was mistaken. I quickly learned that the people of Cyprus feel like they live in a forgotten country. The island is divided with a North and South side created by a painful history of invasion and memories of violence and war. 

We spoke to many who were there, or remembered what happened to their grandparents. There is so much hurt and division. I can't help but think that satan is not too creative. It's the same lie of hate and division he has spread throughout time. It's the same spirit of hate that lives along with fear and creates division with war, racism, and politics. The North side is Muslim and the south is Greek Orthodox. It feels like two different countries. We walked the north side and heard stories of the past, feeling the oppression and the loss. The history seems complex and everyone we spoke to seemed to have a different version of the troubling story. 

Flag of the North side on the mountain

Walking the North side

A sign we saw in Greece. 

A sign that sits near the borders. 

At one point, the missionary leaders told us some of the history. He spoke a little of the refugees and I will never forget his words. As Christians we have often prayed to reach the unreachable in the places that will never have a chance to hear about Jesus. I remember as a kid growing up in church, hearing from missionaries and having our church pray for the unreachable. In a way, our prayers are being answered. They are showing up on our shores in the thousands. I wonder how many people who prayed those prayers are now saying “No Vacancy Here.” People are broken, weary, and looking for something more. This is our moment to embrace them, to be Jesus to them, and be the kind of Christians that will be impactful in reaching out to them. Let’s not build walls, and shut our doors. Let’s show them the love of Jesus. 

While we were on Cyprus some of us helped out with some construction projects. Some of us went onto the College campus to get to know the culture and really just build relationships. That is how our missionaries work. They “do life” with the people they are trying to reach. At first I was a little nervous to just walk up to complete strangers and start a conversation. The Lord knows I can talk and have more words than necessary. But getting the ball rolling seemed awkward to me at first. 

I decided to embrace the awkward. And it went better than I expected. 

It was fascinating to talk with others - to hear how they viewed us, what their family dynamic and views of religion are like. My favorites to talk with were the freshman girls. My mama heart just went out to them. The first year in school, away from home, trying to figure out what you want to do for school. I remember those years, and the excitement and yet the feeling of being lost. 

My favorite question to ask them was “what would be your dream job, if you could do anything in the world?” I loved to see their faces light up as they talked about what they wanted to do and where they wanted to live. See, they may be halfway across the world and seem so different, but really they aren’t that different from us. They have hopes, dreams, and ideas. And they have a longing for something more. One of the things our missionary said was that it may not seem like a big thing talking with people, but he challenged us to ask their names and pray for them…you may be the only person who ever says a prayer for them. That made an impact on me. I know the power of prayer, how it has shaped me, and I am here and who I am because of the prayers that were said for me.

Some of the new friends we made! 

On this trip there was a verse that really stuck out to me found in Psalms 51;12 “Restore the Joy of my salvation to me, and give me a willing spirit.” 

This is what God did for me on this trip, I have always been glad I know Jesus and thankful for what he did for me. But I have forgotten what a privilege I have that I live in a place where I have always known his name and that I will not be persecuted for my faith; or disowned by my family and friends if I choose to follow Jesus. I know that life is better with Jesus and that there is healing with him. That he can heal and restore when we do not see a way. What is impossible for us is possible for him. 

I’ve seen this firsthand in my life and especially in my marriage. 

It’s hard to see a way for reconciliation between the two sides of Cyprus. But I know with Jesus all things are possible. I have a new joy of my salvation. I pray for a willing spirit. A willing spirit not just in what we view to be the big things, but in the small things as well. A willing spirt amongst the mundane days of my life; in stopping to talk with people, in building relationships, in listening to that small voice to stop and pray or helping others. 

See, I always thought my heart was global. My prayer has always been to let my heart break for what breaks God’s. But I came home with my heart being more missional. I need to live in a way that brings light to others and remember that every moment can matter. We can do that right here, every day. 

Coincidentally, on my first day home I was back at my Target (my second home). The cashier commented on how she hasn’t seen me for a while. This is when you realize you are here too much. In my defense, I often come with as a party of 5 and we seem to be a memorable group. But today I learned that she was from Syria and she still has a sister and most of her family there. We talked briefly about church and about war. My kids asked me in front of her, “Is this your friend, mom?” “She is now,” I said. 

I see her there all the time. She works a lot. I will be choosing her line more and keep that conversation going. My heart breaks for her - being torn from your world, leaving family behind. The verse Psalms 51:12-13 goes on to say that “Restore the joy of my salvation, and give me a willing spirit. Then I will teach the rebellious your ways and the sinners will return to you.”

We have divine appointments all around us. Our interactions each day affect those around us. I pray I keep that boldness, exude the joy of my Jesus, and that my eyes and ears are open each day to those around me. 

I had one other cool thing I have to share as well…

On our last day, we were back in Thessaloniki. We drove out to Philippi, the ancient city you can read about in Acts 16. It’s one of my favorite stories in the Bible - when Paul and Silas are thrown into jail. There was an earthquake and they could have walked right out. But instead, they bring the guard to faith. Again our missionary with gave us some great perspective in this story.

In later chapters, Paul goes on and when stopped again he uses his Roman citizenship to help him. What’s interesting is that he could have done that in  the Philippi situation as well. But he did not. He chose to be beaten, broken, and jailed for the glory of God. He said that sometimes we have to lay down our rights or privilege for others to see God or for others to come to faith. I love when you can read the Bible your whole life and never see it like that. 

As we walked through what was once the marketplace in Philippi, I had the strongest feeling of Déjà vu; like nothing I have ever had. Then I remembered the dream I had many months ago, when going to Greece was just a small thought in my head. I had a dream that I was walking through ruins with people I did not know. In my dream, I was worried about snakes. I wasn’t afraid, though. I remember thinking it was an odd dream. I wrote it in my journal and thought maybe I was supposed to go to Greece. That moment walking through, I had been there before. The worry of snakes came from the children we were with who kept saying they had seen snakes there. 

Indiana Jones and I have the same phobia. I hate snakes. 

I have no idea why I dreamed of that moment, or what it all means. But for me, it was just a confirmation that I was supposed to be on this trip. 

The River Valley global team at Philippi

The place where Paul was taken captive, go re read Acts 16! Pretty amazing. 

Walking the ruins of Phillipi

One of the guys on our trip said that “Cyprus and Greece were now tattooed on his heart.” I think that is true for all of us. I will never forget the forgotten country, the faces I met, or the stories I heard. I will not forget the modern day apostles I met and the love of Jesus I saw on their faces. I will never forget their willing spirits and the obedience they have in following Jesus. To me they are heroes and I was honored to spend a few days with them. I will never forget the power of prayer or how it felt when praying and worshiping God in a dark place. I will never forget the people on my trip and how God wove together everyone to be there. This trip changed lives within our group. 

So if you’ve been on the fence about going on a trip, I encourage you to just go - change your place, change your pace, change your perspective. 

Such an amazing group of people, loved our team!

Had to share this pic too, the beautiful shores of Cyprus. I have a story to share about this too but that will have to be for another blog. 

Change your place, Change your pace, Change your perspective.

Greece. Change your place, change your pace, change your perspective. 

Fresh off the plane from a 10-day trip to Thessaloniki, Greece and Cyprus. The jetlag is kicking in and I have been awake since 3;30am am. I decided to stop fighting it and get up and make good use of my time. I will be drinking ALL the coffee today. There are so many things I want to share with you from this trip…so many stories. My prayer is always God uses my blog for his glory, and I pray it stirs something in my readers. 

“Change your place, change your pace, change your perspective” was heard many times from our missionary leader in Greece. It was one of the first things he spoke to us and as the days went on, the truth of those words rang in my ears. 

We began in Thessaloniki with the “Walk for Freedom” with the A21 Campaign. A21 fights human trafficking. This was one of the reason this trip tugged at my heart. I will never forget the day 9 years ago when I first learned about human trafficking, I will never forget that there are more in slavery today than ever before. That there are over 27 million in slavery and 2 million of those are children. The average victim is 12 years old. Of those numbers, only 1-2% are ever rescued. 

These statistics are not ok. They break my heart. But as Christine Caine has said, compassion is action. I can’t just feel bad about it and do nothing. I support groups like A21 and IJM, using my time, talent, and money as I am able. I have gone to Washington DC to lobby for change. It’s easy to think that this is some other country’s problem. But it’s happening in your own backyard, in your city.  

As we walked the streets to bring awareness to human trafficking, I prayed for Thessaloniki; that more are found, more are rescued, and more operations are shut down. After the walk was over, we were approached by a small girl, maybe 6 or 7, asking for money. She had a big scar on her face that almost looked like it was from a burn. There was something in her eyes that seemed so far off to me, almost dead…like she wasn’t there. We were informed that there are many children there that they are basically trafficked to beg for money. They injure or hurt them to gain more sympathy. Even though I know these things occur, seeing it, seeing her, broke me. The enemy is so pathetic that he goes after the innocent and the vulnerable. 

We spent one day in Greece, then headed to Cyprus. If you’re like me, you don’t really know anything about Cyprus. I assumed it was part of Greece. But I was mistaken. I quickly learned that the people of Cyprus feel like they live in a forgotten country. The island is divided with a North and South side created by a painful history of invasion and memories of violence and war. 

We spoke to many who were there, or remembered what happened to their grandparents. There is so much hurt and division. I can't help but think that satan is not too creative. It's the same lie of hate and division he has spread throughout time. It's the same spirit of hate that lives along with fear and creates division with war, racism, and politics. The North side is Muslim and the south is Greek Orthodox. It feels like two different countries. We walked the north side and heard stories of the past, feeling the oppression and the loss. The history seems complex and everyone we spoke to seemed to have a different version of the troubling story. 

Flag of the North side on the mountain

Walking the North side

A sign we saw in Greece. 

A sign that sits near the borders. 

At one point, the missionary leaders told us some of the history. He spoke a little of the refugees and I will never forget his words. As Christians we have often prayed to reach the unreachable in the places that will never have a chance to hear about Jesus. I remember as a kid growing up in church, hearing from missionaries and having our church pray for the unreachable. In a way, our prayers are being answered. They are showing up on our shores in the thousands. I wonder how many people who prayed those prayers are now saying “No Vacancy Here.” People are broken, weary, and looking for something more. This is our moment to embrace them, to be Jesus to them, and be the kind of Christians that will be impactful in reaching out to them. Let’s not build walls, and shut our doors. Let’s show them the love of Jesus. 

While we were on Cyprus some of us helped out with some construction projects. Some of us went onto the College campus to get to know the culture and really just build relationships. That is how our missionaries work. They “do life” with the people they are trying to reach. At first I was a little nervous to just walk up to complete strangers and start a conversation. The Lord knows I can talk and have more words than necessary. But getting the ball rolling seemed awkward to me at first. 

I decided to embrace the awkward. And it went better than I expected. 

It was fascinating to talk with others - to hear how they viewed us, what their family dynamic and views of religion are like. My favorites to talk with were the freshman girls. My mama heart just went out to them. The first year in school, away from home, trying to figure out what you want to do for school. I remember those years, and the excitement and yet the feeling of being lost. 

My favorite question to ask them was “what would be your dream job, if you could do anything in the world?” I loved to see their faces light up as they talked about what they wanted to do and where they wanted to live. See, they may be halfway across the world and seem so different, but really they aren’t that different from us. They have hopes, dreams, and ideas. And they have a longing for something more. One of the things our missionary said was that it may not seem like a big thing talking with people, but he challenged us to ask their names and pray for them…you may be the only person who ever says a prayer for them. That made an impact on me. I know the power of prayer, how it has shaped me, and I am here and who I am because of the prayers that were said for me.

Some of the new friends we made! 

On this trip there was a verse that really stuck out to me found in Psalms 51;12 “Restore the Joy of my salvation to me, and give me a willing spirit.” 

This is what God did for me on this trip, I have always been glad I know Jesus and thankful for what he did for me. But I have forgotten what a privilege I have that I live in a place where I have always known his name and that I will not be persecuted for my faith; or disowned by my family and friends if I choose to follow Jesus. I know that life is better with Jesus and that there is healing with him. That he can heal and restore when we do not see a way. What is impossible for us is possible for him. 

I’ve seen this firsthand in my life and especially in my marriage. 

It’s hard to see a way for reconciliation between the two sides of Cyprus. But I know with Jesus all things are possible. I have a new joy of my salvation. I pray for a willing spirit. A willing spirit not just in what we view to be the big things, but in the small things as well. A willing spirt amongst the mundane days of my life; in stopping to talk with people, in building relationships, in listening to that small voice to stop and pray or helping others. 

See, I always thought my heart was global. My prayer has always been to let my heart break for what breaks God’s. But I came home with my heart being more missional. I need to live in a way that brings light to others and remember that every moment can matter. We can do that right here, every day. 

Coincidentally, on my first day home I was back at my Target (my second home). The cashier commented on how she hasn’t seen me for a while. This is when you realize you are here too much. In my defense, I often come with as a party of 5 and we seem to be a memorable group. But today I learned that she was from Syria and she still has a sister and most of her family there. We talked briefly about church and about war. My kids asked me in front of her, “Is this your friend, mom?” “She is now,” I said. 

I see her there all the time. She works a lot. I will be choosing her line more and keep that conversation going. My heart breaks for her - being torn from your world, leaving family behind. The verse Psalms 51:12-13 goes on to say that “Restore the joy of my salvation, and give me a willing spirit. Then I will teach the rebellious your ways and the sinners will return to you.”

We have divine appointments all around us. Our interactions each day affect those around us. I pray I keep that boldness, exude the joy of my Jesus, and that my eyes and ears are open each day to those around me. 

I had one other cool thing I have to share as well…

On our last day, we were back in Thessaloniki. We drove out to Philippi, the ancient city you can read about in Acts 16. It’s one of my favorite stories in the Bible - when Paul and Silas are thrown into jail. There was an earthquake and they could have walked right out. But instead, they bring the guard to faith. Again our missionary with gave us some great perspective in this story.

In later chapters, Paul goes on and when stopped again he uses his Roman citizenship to help him. What’s interesting is that he could have done that in  the Philippi situation as well. But he did not. He chose to be beaten, broken, and jailed for the glory of God. He said that sometimes we have to lay down our rights or privilege for others to see God or for others to come to faith. I love when you can read the Bible your whole life and never see it like that. 

As we walked through what was once the marketplace in Philippi, I had the strongest feeling of Déjà vu; like nothing I have ever had. Then I remembered the dream I had many months ago, when going to Greece was just a small thought in my head. I had a dream that I was walking through ruins with people I did not know. In my dream, I was worried about snakes. I wasn’t afraid, though. I remember thinking it was an odd dream. I wrote it in my journal and thought maybe I was supposed to go to Greece. That moment walking through, I had been there before. The worry of snakes came from the children we were with who kept saying they had seen snakes there. 

Indiana Jones and I have the same phobia. I hate snakes. 

I have no idea why I dreamed of that moment, or what it all means. But for me, it was just a confirmation that I was supposed to be on this trip. 

The River Valley global team at Philippi

The place where Paul was taken captive, go re read Acts 16! Pretty amazing. 

Walking the ruins of Phillipi

One of the guys on our trip said that “Cyprus and Greece were now tattooed on his heart.” I think that is true for all of us. I will never forget the forgotten country, the faces I met, or the stories I heard. I will not forget the modern day apostles I met and the love of Jesus I saw on their faces. I will never forget their willing spirits and the obedience they have in following Jesus. To me they are heroes and I was honored to spend a few days with them. I will never forget the power of prayer or how it felt when praying and worshiping God in a dark place. I will never forget the people on my trip and how God wove together everyone to be there. This trip changed lives within our group. 

So if you’ve been on the fence about going on a trip, I encourage you to just go - change your place, change your pace, change your perspective. 

Such an amazing group of people, loved our team!

Had to share this pic too, the beautiful shores of Cyprus. I have a story to share about this too but that will have to be for another blog.